My mother passed away on March 21st, as did my husbands mother.  His mother in the early morning hours and mine later that evening.  Hospice was attending my mother-in-law, but my mother's was somewhat unexpected.  She was sicker than anyone had known and knowing her, she just kept it from me.  I feel like I should have read the signs...but I didn't.  Now, I believe, she died the way she needed to.  She didn't have to leave her home, as we were starting to look for assisted care for her.  She went very quickly and peacefully, and that is very comforting to me.  I will miss her deeply!

I didn't get any of mom's talents.  She was a very talented writer and she taught me to quilt and knit and crochet.  But most importantly, she taught me how to live and die.  She was a very strong woman, though she would never admit to that.  She just did what she had to do to get by and survive life.
While looking through some of her papers last night, I found one of her writings, I thought very appropriate for right now. 

Out of the Forest

 

With the yesterdays winding behind me in an ever lengthening trail I reflect upon them not with sorrow that they are behind me, nor with the yearning to view again those that are so far beyond yesterday that I remember only snatches of the scenery.  

To go back and view again the most choice bits of wayside and then to travel on would lead me again through the forest of sorrow and despair.  No, I would not care to find myself there again.

 

There were voices there..the voices of Everyone , but in the depths of that jungle, I was alone, as were they.  No sunlight pierced that dark place to allow one to find another or lead each other out. As we all travel seperate trails, yet the paths all converge in that forest.  Some never find their way out and remain there still, forever lost and entangled in that gloom. Those of us who found our way out had seen a gleam of light, piercing through the muddled confusion of thickest darkness and we thrashed toward that elusive light.

Some of the voices in that dark wilderness were not as frantic sounding as others. 

 Some had found a path comparatively free of briars and thorns; where the underbrush was not quite as thick and the darkness more grey than black.  But they are the ones I worry about.  They were not so afraid; their path was smoother and some didn't mind it there at all. 

Some stayed by choice.  Their twilight grey did  not allow enough contrast for them to be able to perceive the gleam of light that led me out. Oh, I'm not sorry I made the trip, not at all!  It had to be.  It's the only way to arrive at the lovely place where I am now.  The yesterdays are neither remembered or forgotten with any great emotion. 

 It is the road ahead of me, my tomorrows, that I'm excited about.  The view is indescribably beautiful and here come all the others who have emerged from the forest to take my hand and we continue our journey together.  We can see forever all the tomorrows are in plain view. That beautiful, illuminating brilliance is everywhere now and we are out of the forest.  Only once must we pass through that place. 

 There is no need to ever go back and pass through it again. As more emerge from that inevitable, despicable forest we join hands and travel on together.  The highway is wide and beautiful and takes us to tomorrow and forever, toward a light that grows brighter and lovelier as each days journey takes us closer to eternity.

 

 Annette J. Franklin Reynolds

 

I know she is in the light and now living her eternity!  I love you mom!